30-10-09

I'm totally sadden, by the way I'm being treated. I don't know if you're still reading what i've said over here. Sometimes these are those things that i really don't know how to phrase it in my mouth to tell it to you. Today has really dashed my slimmest hope off. You've really totally changed the way you treat me, i rmb you saying that you'll nvr be harsh on anyone, but i guess this wasn't suppose to be. Perhaps i am really to fucked up that gave you every reason to do this to me.

I really don't know what more can i do le. I am going crazy soon. Can i just don't want this kind of treatment? I know i am really going crazy le. Can't i even have a good memories up till probably mid of next year? Though i really hope we can be tgth for long, maybe forever. But now the case seems to be twisting away from what everything seems to be initially.

I'm just speechless!!!


I just know i am FUCKED!!!

28-10-09

I really have so much that i wanna tell you. Quite a number of things happened these few days, i just hope you were there to share with me. But i guess fate has taken you away.

Going back to Penang later on, will probably be back later. Lets pray that i will be back safe and sound.

And i hope you will have time for me on Friday evening. But i am not holding high hopes about it.

Goodbye everyone!


*If i die & go to heaven, i'll put your name on a golden star, so that all the angels can see how much you mean to me.
I love you now, and always will!

25-10-09

I have so much to say and so much to tell, but i just don't think i should say it over here.

Been rather tired out past few days. Did not sleep much. And don't know whats wrong with me that keep making me so thirsty all the time. Been drinking lots of water. Alright, maybe i know whats wrong with myself.

Got into a race with this Honda Jazz just now along BKE, and man, he wasn't bad at all i should say. I was behind him all the way for like almost 3km then only i managed to overtake him in a really daring way. If not i probably would have stayed behind him all the way i guess.

Still can't sleep right now, gonna try my best to. But i just wish to talk to you on the phone, but i think you've fallen asleep yet again. Nights!

Nights ppl, bye!

23-10-09

How long more time will i get from the god?? Will i still have all the time to wait? I just hope i have more time to share with you, cherish all the moment that we have tgth.

I just pray hard for everything to change.

I love you! And i know i do deeply!

21-10-09

I know its gonna be a sleepless night for me again tonight. My mind just keep thinking, and many things seems to be running through my mind. Yes, though i know why, but i just can't stop it from thinking, and i don't know what exactly its on, just think, think, think of many things.

I just got this feeling that you really holds back on something that you did not tell me, but i couldn't force it out your mouth as i know you won't say it. I just hope you can trust and have faith in me to open up to me. I don't know if i ever will get it. Anyway, wanted to meet you today, but ended up, sigh!! Also don't know why you'll end up promising to meet others when we're alr suppose to meet. Seems like what i might be thinking could be right.

Argh!!! Why the F*** am i whinning here??? Just waiting for you to reach home and call me. I wonder if you would, if not, means i got another thing right le. Hopefully its not like that!!!

Bye!

19-10-09

Warning!!!
What i am going to post soon might make you hopping mad, or it may make you laugh like mad too!
Muahahahhaha!(:

Someone asked me to give her morning call at about 11plus.

SO....... My day was broken into 2 'wonderful' segments......

(18-10-09)
Started my day ytd by fetching Chet Meng as he got to go work at Gain City, AMK. But before sending him straight there, i ask him to accompany me to get my new specs done as my current one is not gonna last long anymore. Selected the one i find most suitable for me, and ya, i spent quite alot on it as the itchy me wanted to get myself the transition lense. Hahah!(:

After that we headed to Gain City and i decided to go have a look at their GPS device selling price since i still have sometime before its 11am. After that, i did a trial on the device that i spent slightly below 200bucks for to lead me to the place that my sweaty segment begins. Hahah!

I reached my destination, and right, its about 12plus in the afternoon, and did i forget to mention i alr started giving 'you' morning call, but you seems to have fainted with your h/p by your side! Hahah!:P And i continued calling 'you' off and on just below your house, but still to no avail! I was tired, thus i decided to sleep in my car, but without my engine running. And god! It was definitely agonising with the weather, plus the hottest Sun at 12-1pm. Totally awake and gave up on calling you at about 2plus. Went all the way back to Admarilty to meet Ivan and god, he also slept till about 2:30pm, why is everyone in such a sleeping mood ytd but not me??-_-|||

And right, finally my 1st segment ytd ended with you telling me you've woke up while i was with Ivan halfway through our don't lunch or tea... Cuz i told him lets meet for tea, but he ended up eating alot, and me eating some too.

The next segment begins with (like i said), you trying to be funny is it???(rings a bell in you?) Hahah!(:
One moment she told me still wanna go JB, the next tell me but go in do what? Then followed by telling me she cab down to Woodlands, the next moment not coming again. Alright, but i gotta say in the end, the decision is for me to pick her up, then meet another sleeper to acc her buy things. We headed to Zion Hawker for 'dinner' 1st, followed by the decision to also go catch a movie later in the night. Went 'The Cathay' to watch "Funny People". And right, i gotta say its a typical no story line, but, lame with super funny jokes in it if you can catch them. Rated M18 for its dirty humour and its full of nuts jokes! Went Bukit Timah for supper, and met Yusiang up. And so, my day ended with, yes, sending her home.

I really wonder why did i not hop mad at you when i know i am really mad at the point of time, but after you told me you're awake, my anger just sank down somehow, when you hop into my car, the anger was just totally wiped off... Why ah?? Perhaps if i am "R", i wouldn't be talking to you for the say next 1week?? Hahah!! You know what i meant by saying "R" right?(:

(19-10-09)
Today is more of a boring day. Woke up relatively early as usual, went out to meet a friend for lunch and ran some errands and do what i am suppose to do today. Intended to go in Sg earlier in the afternoon, but felt tired, so went back home to wait for you to wake up again. Watch a show in my room while waiting, but in the end i still decided not to go Sg anymore and only you know why! Hahah!(: Anyway, i fell asleep all the way till almost 8. So i went out took dinner as a loner and came back facing my lappy. Like what 'George Simmons' said, i have lots of friends on the internet, so when people ask me what will i be doing tonight, i would say: 'I will be home sitting infront of my computer.'

Thats about it for this entry i guess! Did i miss out on anything?? If not, then, BYE!!!(:



ps: waiting for you to text me, hopefully its a call, so that i can hear your voice!(:

17-10-09

Done with the SAF Officer's Wives Club Annual Tea today. Its kind of interesting and definitely the best experience i gotten so far, not in the aspect of the coordinating, but in the aspect of the people i met, i mingled and socialized with. I was invited as their guest on their only VIP table, sitting beside their ex-club presidents and current president. They are all in their fifties and sixties, its indeed a challenge for me to actually bring out common sharing topics with them, but still, i tried my best to actually hold conversations with them and get to know them. Also i met one of the minister's wife, if i'm not wrong. Hahah! But i guess i certainly has made an strong impact on the wives club as i am the only man invited to join in the tea session, and also done something which i am sure put up a good image of kimrobinson. Hopefully i will be able to attract the minister's wife into our salon to try our service. Probably that will be the last most succesful thing i am able to do bahx!(:

Don't know if we're still gonna go batam tmr, nevertheless, i'm sure we will still have other plans lined up!

Anyway, i don't know why today i suddenly feel very tired again, and i guess it slightly affected my mood alittle. Sorry ya!

Don't know what else to write for now. Thats it folk!

Bye!

15-10-09

How i wish you're by my side right now, but i know for some reason , it is impossible!

I'm sick, very very sick again. Was running a fever early in the morning, but still got to report for work as there are some urgent things for me to clear. Got it cleared very quickly then left.

When i went to the doctor, he said i alr got no fever, so he don't know gave me what medication. Went home to get a good sleep, but my fever came back again while i was sleeping. I felt as if my sould couldn't decide where is me real body as i could feel there were 4-5 bodies around me. My whole mind is in a daze, but when you sms, i know it was you, thats why my mind only told me to call you back at that time. I'm glad i gave you that phone call too anyway. Hahah!

Vomit twice alr, hopefully i'm alright by tmr morning.

*pray*

Tata!



ps: actually there is something in my heart that i feel like asking you, and i really hope to get a honest answer from you. Can i?

14-10-09

I got some feelings! Don't know if i felt it correctly, hope you can enlighten me! Can you??

12-10-09

I don't know what is really stopping you, but i just want to let you know, my mind is made and my heart has decided. The only thing i'm hoping for now is for us to leave by next year, even if its only 2 of us, i hope you also will leave.

Just have faith and confident in me. I won't ask pressurize you anymore, and i will learn more about you to understand you even deeper. But i still do hope for your pampering and for me to pamper you back! Hahah!(:

Loves!

11-10-09

I really just need the time! Can i have it? From what you told me today, it really woke me up and i don't know why i suddenly have the thinking that i'm a goner. It made me think back of the past few weeks, and made me realised that yeah, i really did not try to understand you. Instead, you're the one who has been trying hard to understand me and accommodate me. I am very blur when it comes to catching the special feelings in a r/s, i hope you could tell me more about how you feel, but i will also try my very best to learn and catch your feelings myself too.

You said i'm pressurizing you, but seriously, i am not. Cuz i told you before that i'm alr prepared to face all those whom we need to face tgth. I am sure we can face the music tgth...(: I just need you to have faith in me. Come to think of it, yes, i admit i have been asking too much. So from now, i will not do that anymore. You call the shot, and i do the bidding. (but can i call the shot sometimes too??) Hahah!(:

Both cars has problems now, and it will really cost me lots of time and money this time round.): Guess i really need more sleep recently, if not more accidents are coming up... Which of course i don't want cuz i still have a long way to go with my special someone(you)..;P

Gonna have some slp now. Excited on the trip to batam with you. Promise to bring you to SOTS in time to come.(:

Goodnights!




ps: i just want to let you know that you means alot to me, and i hope i will be the one to hold you hand from now till forever! Loves!!

08-10-09

Have been dwelling into a sentence since last night. And really been thinking in every possible way in order to minimise the misinterpreting and misunderstanding of it.

I saw your msn nick, i hope i did not guess wrongly, and if my guess is right, is it for me to see so that i can react? And of course i hope its for me to see laa. But you knew my chinese SUCKS!! And damn, i really spent loads of time just to find out what exactly the few words means and when put tgth, what will it turn out to be. But for your sake, its really worth the effort to find out..

From what i understand from there, it shows that the only thing i could do now is to give all of what i have and can to gamble on a hand. And of course, i will do that and give my best shot to make it a very good gamble! So you shall just see k? Even if i really lose on that hand, i will still try again and again. But of course who will wanna bet on losing, but just be prepared to face losing though.

Had a great evening tonight though my evening last night was really bad. You brought me to experience something i never went before, and man! Its really cool! Shall we go there again soon, just 2 of us again? Hahah!(:

Thats for tonight! I guess finally i could have a goodnight slp tonight le.(:

Nights!

07-10-09

Couldn't put myself to slp yet again. Why am i also so insensitive to be able to spot little little things that i have been missing out?? Am i really that stupid? FUCK!!! I guess perhaps i've been missing out on lots of opportunities and chances. Am i still too late? I am really not sure, but i will keep trying and trying and trying!

I really have been thinking so much today. Been driving crazily around both jb and sg today as none of my friends is able to accompany me in the afternoon, and i was really bored to the core!!! Driving is my interest, and it can make me feel occupied when i'm down.

I am sad to say this if you are one of those who has made the sacrifice to accompany for tea tonight, but tgth with you all, it really did not cheer me up much, and i kinda regretted drinking the tea as i miss out yet another greatest opportunity to be able to hear her voice. Perhaps i was really way too insensitive to be able to make the right choice. But one thing i am sure of, i have made the right choice to choose her, and even till now, wait for her to return.

Really don't know what else to say le. Still lots of things running through my mind right now that made me even more awake. When will all these end? Will be the day you return babe!

Goodnight, and i love you!(:

06-10-09

My heart is bleeding and crying at the same time! But i know i need to stay strong in order to be able to prove to you and bring you back to my side. I'm sorry for everything, all those we had is so short lived, i just hope i had more time to show you what i can do for you. I hope you can still believe in me that i really can improve and change for the better. I just need the chance that wasn't presented to me. I will keep wait till the day that my chance is back, and i know from then on, i will nvr disappoint you ever again. I wanna be the one to be able to make you laugh and cry, but with the tears of joy!

You've have made me know that i have fallen deeply for you, and how much you means to me now. You're now the 2nd girl that gave me such a feeling, and i really don't feel good about it. I now you told me to change 1st before you see anymore chances in us, but i really don't wish for that as i hope we can be close so that you will really see the changes that i can do for the sake of the word 'love' that i have for you.

Guys, cherish all the lovely girlf that you all have now, don't regret it when you made a mistake and lose everything. How i wish i can turn back time, just turn back 2days earlier and restart everything. But i know its impossible.

Goodbye!

05-10-09

I really can't slp well the whole night despite being very very tired. Hasn't been slping much, but what has happen these 2 days made me think alot, and esp last night. I really wish i could pour my heart out to let you know how i think, but will i ever get the chance to do it again?? I hope i can. Please!

03-10-09

Sorry baby to have spoilt your night just hours before. Only we know what happened, so don't elaborate so much. But i promise from now on, i will not make things halfway like what you said earlier. I unknowingly made you unhappy, but that is the process that i will need to go through in order to get to know you better. I learn about you better from my mistakes, but i will keep doing better with all my mistake. Hope i will be better for you.

Hi ppl, been tired recently again. But i enjoy every moment of my life now that with someone whom i love.(: Anyway, i just got home like not long, and my back is aching in pain till i could not fall asleep. Argh!!! One moment is my shoulder, the other moment become my back. Really can't stand the pain of my back!! Hopefully i can fall asleep soon and wake up feeling good.

Kim has arrive in sg, and it will be a busy day later from morning till night. Hopefully i will be able to pull through the day if my back is still aching. *pray*

Nth much to post about anymore, will update again ya!(:

Bye, nights!